Boobs' team you should bet on if betting were legal lock of the week

Since I haven't lost a football bet in 3 weeks, well teams I would have bet on if I was in Vegas anyway, I decided to start a lock of the week to make sure I jinx myself and not win another bet for the rest of the year. But if my streak is to continue here are the two teams (1 college, 1 Pro) I like this weekend and why.

COLLEGE LOCK OF THE WEEK
Wyoming (+10) at Air Force (-10)
AIR FORCE.
Why: Air Force's losses this year: at Minnesota (by 7) because of a fluke fumble the Gophers returned for a touchdown, at Navy (in overtime by 3), the same Navy team that had the No. 7 ranked Ohio St on the ropes in Colombus, and No. 12 TCU by 3 points last week. They run the triple option and play in the mountain air. Not good news for a road Wyoming team this week, that frankly, just isn't very good. They have won some close games this year against Florida Atlantic, UNLV, and the powerhouse Weber St. They got blanked by Colorado 24-0.
Bottom Line: On a neutral field Air Force is two touchdowns better. At home they could be 3. Yeah i'll take Air Force and give the points.
Final Score: Air Force 31, Wyoming 10
(Also Considered: West Virginia -20 against Marshall, Colorado St +22 at TCU)

NFL LOCK OF THE WEEK

N.Y. Giants (+3) at New Orleans (-3)

N.Y.Giants.

WHY: I wanted to take the Falcons over Bears, but since I am a huge Falcons fan I decided that would probably come off as bias and no one would believe me anyway. So I'm going to take the game of the week instead. I think the Giants are the best team in the NFC. Going on the road doesn't matter to them, they have been the best road team in the NFL the last two years. When they won the Super Bowl two years ago they did by beating Tampa Bay, Dallas, and Green Bay on the road. Even though I don't like Eli Manning (really you're too good to play with LT in 75 degree weather year-round), he plays better on the road and under pressure. The Giants will run the ball, control the clock, and not turn the ball over. Eli will make plays when he has to. The Giants defensive line will force Brees into uncharacteristic mistakes. And in case you forgot, it's not like the Saints offense has been on fire the last two games against the Bills and Jets.

Bottom Line: The Giants are better and underdogs. They won't give the Saints 14 points from turnovers. I am assuming Eli Manning is healthy and I haven't heard anything to contradict that. The Giants will win AND just in case you get three points. Take the Giants.

Final Score: N.Y.Giants 27, New Orleans 20

(Also Considered: Atlanta-3 against the Bears, Jets -9 against the Bills)

DISCLAIMER: Schrempf Scampi is not responsible for any bets that you would have made and any money you would have lost if betting were legal.

Mark May Expresses What We're All Thinking

This is one of the greatest screw-ups caught on live tv.

Credit goes to Detroit4Lyfe



He'll probably play it off like he was yawning, but I think we all know what Mark May was really thinking. Hopefully this stays up long enough for the world to enjoy.

UPDATE: Video is now down, can't find a replacement...but for the archives, it's a video of Lou Holtz rambling on about how Jimmy Clausen is the greatest athlete in the history of all sports ever and the camera suddenly cuts to Mark May making a suggestive gesture involving his hand and an open mouth.....it just didn't look good at all.

Long story short, Lou Holtz has lost any semblance left of his mind and needs to be let go if not for anything else but his disgusting bias towards Notre Dame. How's that Notre Dame BCS Champion pick lookin', Lou?

Schrempf Scampi's 2009 College Football Predictions

The picks are only a week late, as you will see from my pick of Oklahoma State winning the championship... I knew I would be wrong, but I just wish it wasn't proven so early.

JP

ACC Champ: Georgia Tech
Big 12 Champ: Oklahoma State
Big East Champ: West Virginia
Big Ten Champ: Penn State
C-USA Champ: Tulsa
MAC Champ: Toledo
Mtn West Champ:BYU
Pac-10 Champ: USC
SEC Champ: Florida
Sun Belt Champ: North Texas
WAC Champ: Boise St.

Heisman Winner: Jahvid Best

BCS National Champion: Oklahoma State

Bold, Random Prediction: Oklahoma State as my champ doesn't count? Tennessee beats Florida

Player who probably won't win the heisman but deserves it anyway: Dez Bryant


Pederman


ACC Champ: Clemson
Big 12 Champ: Kansas
Big East Champ: West Virginia
Big Ten Champ: Michigan State
C-USA Champ: East Carolina
MAC Champ: Central Michigan
Mtn West Champ:BYU
Pac-10 Champ: California
SEC Champ: Ole Miss
Sun Belt Champ: Troy
WAC Champ: Boise St.

Heisman Winner: Todd Reesing

BCS National Champion: BYU. Its 1984 all over again. Ty Detmer baby!!!!

Bold, Random Prediction: None of these predictions can happen. We are all dumber for reading them.

Player who probably won't win the heisman but deserves it anyway: Greg Paulus!!!! Just kidding he sucks balls. Noel Devine or Dennis Pitta its a toss up. What about Dan LeFevour?


Boobs


ACC Champ: Georgia Tech
Big 12 Champ: Oklahoma
Big East Champ: South Florida
Big Ten Champ: Penn State
C-USA Champ: Southern Mississppi
MAC Champ: Central Michigan
Mtn West Champ:TCU
Pac-10 Champ: Cal
SEC Champ: Florida
Sun Belt Champ: Florida Atlantic
WAC Champ: Boise St.

Heisman Winner: Colt McCoy

BCS National Champion: Florida

Bold, Random Prediction: Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, goes right for one of the Non-BCS teams as they not only make a BCS game, they make the national championship game only to lose to Florida. My pick: Boise St.

Player who probably won't win the heisman but deserves it anyway: Jonathan Dwyer


Vanilla Gorilla


ACC Champ: Georgia Tech
Big 12 Champ: Texas (Gross)
Big East Champ: Cincinnati
Big Ten Champ: Penn State
C-USA Champ: Houston
MAC Champ: Western Michigan
Mtn West Champ:Utah
Pac-10 Champ: Cal
SEC Champ: Florida
Sun Belt Champ: Arkansas St.
WAC Champ: Boise St.

Heisman Winner: Tim Tebow

BCS National Champion: Florida

Bold, Random Prediction:Mizzou makes a run for being the Big 12 Champ even after losing Maclin and Daniel.

Player who probably won't win the heisman but deserves it anyway: Jevan Snead

Today's Thumbs Up and High Five Awesomeness Award Winner...

Kaleb Eulls, come on down!


So you're riding a school bus, doze off while listening to your iPod and wake up to a deranged teenage girl waving a loaded gun around, oh and you have three little sisters on the bus with you. What do you do? Don't answer that, just save yourself the embarrassment, because it's not nearly as awesome as what Kaleb Eulls did.

Eulls:

"I kept my distance for a second, she kind of glanced away or blinked and I got to her," he told the newspaper. He took her down, wrested away the gun, and held it up to show the other kids it was over.

Wow. That is so awesome... it's really nice to hear about some good off-the-field athlete related news. Even better though:

“I just tried to catch her attention to get the girl to point the gun directly at me and not at anyone else,” Eulls said.

He stared her down and would've actually gotten shot so that the others wouldn't. Can we get this kid a movie deal already?

Kaleb Eulls is an 18 year old DE/QB for Yazoo County High School in Mississippi and is a commit to Mississippi State. Kaleb, this TUHFAA's for you.


MSNBC

Remember When Andre Smith Was Considered The Best Lineman in The Draft?

Yeah, doesn't that seem like a long time ago? This kid was the cream of the crop last fall, but his Sugar Bowl suspension pretty much started the snowball rolling downhill. When the combine started, he wasn't even sure he was going to work out. He even admitted he was out of shape and just began working out again the weekend of the combine. Why would he even admit that? He then said he was going to participate in the combine and then mysteriously didn't appear. At this point, a lot of NFL teams were questioning his work-ethic, fitness, and sanity.

Once he actually showed up, he then posted lackluster numbers and gave awesome interviews:

(Per SI.com) Smith reportedly dressed "inappropriately" to the visits and gave conflicting reasons for why he wouldn't work out. "Several" offensive line coaches tell Pauline that they want Smith removed from their teams' draft boards.

I wonder what he was wearing? Hopefully it was that ugly Ed Hardy crap...man I hate that stuff.

(Per NFL.com) Alabama OL Andre Smith benched 225 lbs. only 19 times at the Crimson Tide Pro Day Wednesday.
Smith's long arms make benching more difficult, but this is certainly fewer reps than expected. Smith's reputation is as a punishing, powerful run blocker. We would've bet on something in the 25-30 range.

pfffft... come on Andre, who CAN'T bench 225 lbs 30 times? Actually, I think I just pulled a muscle typing that last sentence.


Alabama OL Andre Smith was "visibly overweight" at his Pro Day Wednesday, according to Profootballtalk.com.
Terms like "not overly impressive," "rough," and "he bombed" are being used to describe Smith's effort.


Is he trying to lose money? When you dedicate your life to football and are projected as a top 5 pick, you figure it shouldn't be that hard to hit the gym and not make an ass out of yourself at the biggest job interview of your life. Just my two cents.

Photo credits go to TheBigLead.