Thursday, March 5, 2009

Popcorn Enthusiast Terrell Owens Cut by Cowboys

In a move that seems surprising right away, but really isn't, the Dallas Cowboys severed their ties with the Terrell Owens sideshow. After laying waste to San Francisco and Philadelphia's respective locker rooms, he brought his act to the one NFL team that will take pretty much anyone...the Dallas Cowboys (Now with more convicted felons than the Cincinnati Bengals!). The Cowboys recent struggles have been magnified by the constant distractions involving Jessica Simpson, tropical vacations, Wade Phillips' unflattering wardrobe choices, scrip clubs, and pretty much everything T.O. does. This is a team that hasn't even won a playoff game since 1996 and they just cut their best offensive player. This looks bad on both parts...the Cowboys need Owens' productivity and still cut him. Of all teams, you'd think Owens could find a way to not piss everyone off in Dallas. Is there anywhere this guy can play without completely imploding the franchise?

So what now? He's obviously going to play somewhere next year; the man's an ass but he can still be a huge offensive benefit to someone out there.

Where does he go?

Minnesota? After losing out on Houshmandzadeh, it would make sense for the Vikings to at least try to bring Owens in. Even if the starting quarterback appears to be the Rosencopter, defenses would still have to respect the Vikings' passing game a lot more which would in turn open up the run game. And with Adrian Peterson, that is a truly scary thing. On the other hand, Brad Childress was T.O.'s offensive coordinator in Philly so he knows firsthand what he would be getting, that could discourage any kind of a deal. Also, Owens himself might not feel comfortable with the quarterback situation in Minny.

Tennessee? The Titans have needed a big-play receiver since...well, forever. They have a stable quarterback situation with aspiring country music sensation Kerry Collins. Along with a solid run-game and defense, this would be a championship caliber team.

New Orleans? Drew Brees slinging to T.O. would just be sick. That team would have potential of being the new "Greatest Show on Turf."

New York Giants? After losing Plaxico to some poor strip club etiquette, the Giants are in need of a replacement. Would they be able to handle the Owens Traveling Circus though? That team pretty much spiraled out of control after Plax pulled a Cheddar Bob.

New England? Brady. Moss. Owens. Really nothing else has to be said. How frustrating would it be to opposing defenses to try and stop that?! The Patriots have come out of nowhere before to sign the marquee player, but I don't know if the entire northeast could support the egos of both Terrell Owens and Randy Moss.

What is apparent is that T.O. will find a new home somewhere. There will always be a team willing to bring in the popcorn man and give him a shot, even though he has never quite meshed with a team and probably never will. The man's career will be defined as having an immense amount of talent, but an ego that always prevented him from getting a ring.

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